All of the little things...

First let me start off by telling you what happened after my last blog.  Yesterday morning Lilly woke up, went down stairs and saw the Gabba Character boxes I stayed up to work on.  Her face lit up and she said, "Mama Look!" She ran over and said, "Hey Fufa, Hey Muno, Hey Plex, Hey Brobee, Hey Toodee!" She talked to them until it was time to leave. When we were leaving she said "Come On Guys".  I literally think she thought they were real! This made my day and let me know that I did a good job!  Ok, as promised here are some other things I made for Lilly's party!

#1- Goody Buckets- Went to the dollar store and got buckets in each of the Gabba colors (Sorry no red for Muno).  I then used paint pens to color on eyes and a nose for Toodee.  Inside the bucket I put the following things-
*Memory game I printed off Nick Jr.com
*Bubbles- dollar store-1 dollar for the bubble packs
*Bubble Gum and Ring Pops
* Train Kit- I took a picture from the "Train" episode of Gabba and stapled it onto a train goody pack from the NC transportation museum.  Inside is a train whistle, pencil, eraser, and 2 free passes to ride the train at the Transportation Museum.  Free, Free, Free... extras from class field trip!

*Krazy Straws

* Yo Gabba Gabba mini coloring book- Printed from NickJr.com

Each thing that is in the bucket has a Yo Gabba Gabba Episode picture that goes along with it.  For example the bubbles have the Gabba Characters blowing bubbles.  The candy Bags have "There's a Party in my Tummy" too.

#2- More boxes.  I made some more boxes tonight also as decoration.  Some are larger, and one is a boom box like DJ Lance has.  My plan is to put the mask I made (pictures later) in the boom box for the kids to take.

#3- Visors.  I found these visors at Hobby Lobby and had to get them.  They were only 3.00 for a pack of 7 visors! The foam for the eyes was only a dollar also! What a deal, and they turned out so cute!

#4- Cozies- These were also at Hobby Lobby today. An 8 pack of cozies were only 3.50!! I used the same foam as before and added eyes to these too.  I plan on using them to hold the utensils at the party, and maybe carry around my Coke Zero!

More pictures will be coming on Saturday of the actual Party and how everything turned out! All ideas I did came from pictures I saw on Google! Parties do not always have to be expensive to be great. With all of the hard work I have put in this is sure going to be a Birthday I remember, and I think Lilly will too!!

Birthday on a Budget...

Lilly's 2nd birthday is coming up, and with the Pageant on the day of her birthday, we decided to move her party to the Saturday before Memorial Day.  This way family can come since it is a long weekend.  Last year for Lilly's birthday, I was in the whole, "Oh my goodness the 1st Birthday I need to go all out!" We even built a deck just for Lilly's party last year.  This year we are on a budget, but still want to give Lilly the best birthday ever!

Lilly's favorite show is Yo Gabba Gabba, so it was obvious that we would do her party in her favorite show. I started looking for decorations, and after spending almost 2 dollars per card for her invitations, I knew this was going to be a HUGE challenge! I continued my search for decorations, and found that Target, Walmart, and Party City did not carry Gabba stuff.  What was I going to do? I researched the Internet and decoration packs started at 35.00 for plates, 1 table piece, and cups! This was outrageous.  Well the teacher in me stepped up to the plate and I decided to make the table decorations myself!!! Ok so I got empty boxes around my house and wrapped them in butcher paper to match the colors of the Gabba Characters. I then cut eyes out of construction paper and glued it to the boxes.  I then got old jewelry boxes and made miniature ones.  I plan on putting the large ones out on the deck (her party is outside) on the stairs or table, and the mini ones on the food table!

Check back tomorrow to see what I have done about goody bags and table decorations!
  

                                        



Mini Boxes





Large Boxes



Journey for Mrs. North Carolina: Your Invited to an Exclusive blog

Journey for Mrs. North Carolina: Your Invited to an Exclusive blog: "Due to the overwhelming emails and messages from my personal blog I have decided to make a blog strictly for Pageant information. "

Mrs. Southern Piedmont *My BUSY life lately*

For all of my many fans (sarcastic for those who can not see my face), I am sorry for the lack of postings lately! I have been so incredibly busy. As many of you know I am competing in the Mrs. North Carolina United States Pageant on June 4th.  I have not blogged directly about the pageant until now.. but I am so excited I can barely contain it! Here are some of  my to do list items:

* Get my dresses altered- Now for all of you wonderfully blessed people who were born tall..congrats to you.  Unfortunately I am considered petite.. and might I ad very petite.  Since I have lost weight, when I went to pick up my dress on Friday they informed me that now it hung, and would need to be altered 4 inches! WOW.. that is with my HUGE heels :) Well, great things come in small packages! Fitted today.. done next week
* Get my hair trimmed up and highlighted.. The Amazing Amber Sprinkle will be doing my hair this Saturday, as well as practicing with some styles for the pageant itself. She is the exclusive hair dresser/make up artist for Mrs. Southern Piedmont.. he he
* Getting my hubby together.. Well he has yet to try on his suit, get his shirt, and tie, order contacts.. need I say more.. on my to do list now
* Nails need to be done ASAP along with two days a week of tanning (for everyone concerned.. 2 days is not a lot, and I haven't been in two weeks so this is great)
* Pick up my altered interview suit and opening number dress- Next week will be done!
* Find Shoes!!! Now this is the most stressful and devastating thing for me.  I love shoes, and had the perfect pair for opening number until my brother made the comment.. "I think they are a little to much".. what?! Then my husband chimed in "I was going to say that too".. oh well, back to the drawing board, and it seems like since proms are over.. no one has what I need :( the search continues!

 The countdown has begun, only 16 more days until the next Mrs. North Carolina United States is crowned!   Plus it is Lilly's Birthday.. good luck..I will take it!

BTW: Here is the link to buy tickets or vote for People's Choice. All money goes to Rising hope Farms! Great Place for Children with Disabilities to get therapy using the horses!


Mrs. North Carolina United States

                                                      Mrs. North Carolina United States

"oh no this did not just happen" AMEN!

As you might have been able to tell from my last blog, this past week has been an emotional roller coaster for my family.  We have a lot of amazing things going on in our lives, and I am taking the time to thank the person who put it all into action! Here is an overview of my blessings this week:

  #1: Andrew was offered a job with a new company.  Not because he was out of work or needed one, just because the man who hired him moved companies and wanted Andrew to come and help build up this other Construction Company.  My husband is a hard worker, a man of integrity, and a Godly man, and this shows in his day to day life.  What a blessing to get this new opportunity and with it, a raise in pay, new truck, and better benefits!

#2: My dress fits! We are in the final countdown until the pageant, and I went to Reign Fine Apparel to do my last fitting for the dress and NO ALTERATIONS NEEDED!! We had planned on taking it out a little in the sides since it was a size to small, but when I put it on this last time it fit great!  Whooo Hoooo!
Now for the biggest blessing of all...

  #3- This started out as a burden.  This past February I had to have my gall bladder removed due to it being diseased and it was causing me to become really sick.  Although the surgery went well, and I am feeling much better, my wallet is not.  Even with my great insurance from school, the hospital bill was way over what we expected to pay!  We have worked it all out until Monday 2 new bill came in.. totaling about 500.00.  I have been very upset because although we are saving all the time, we have just paid for summer vacation, pageant stuff, hospital bills, student loans, and all of the many other things that come along with being homeowners... and then BAM.. we get hit again.  I was taking it really hard this morning, almost to the point of being sick because I knew any extra would have to go straight to those bills.  *Now before anyone says something about saving and such, I want to ad that neither myself or my husband own any credit cards.  We only pay for what we can with what we have.  Anyway I was feeling really down all day, and with no assistant at school today it seemed to make it worse.  After lunch I wen to my mailbox at school and there was a letter addressed to me with PERSONAL written on the outside.  When I opened the envelope there was a letter telling me that this person was giving me a check for a large amount of money because I was a teacher, and they knew with classroom expenses, and budget cuts, and cuts in teacher pay I could use it... WHAT!!! It was exactly enough to cover my bills, and the extra I had spent on classroom supplies 2 weeks ago!

*Now I have NEVER had something like this happen to me before. I feel like I am the luckiest person alive when i find a dollar in my pants pocket! Why did this happen, here is what I am thinking:

   - When I was getting overwhelmed I prayed about the circumstances. God tells us to ask and we shall receive.  Did I pray this morning I would get a large amount of money.. NO, but God works on his time.. as a favorite hymn of mine says "He may not come when you want him..but he'll be there right on time".  I have been praying over our finances since my hospital stay in February, and my prayers were answered!

  - We tithe regularly.  Andrew and I have been going to Elevation Church now for over 4 months.  We have given offering each and every week.  Even weeks we knew we were going to be tight, we continued to give the same amount week after week.  We have not built up to the 10% that God asks of us but we are working toward it each week. This is something new we have started doing and I think God is blessing us with Andrew's new job and the increase in pay, and this blessing a complete stranger gave me today!

  - I am giving back to others.  I have been working very closely with several organizations in the last 6 months, and at times it feels like I am giving a piece of myself in the process. I have been tired, physically and mentally drained, and have even thought about giving up, but God always rejuvenates me, and shows me why I am there... to be an example of Jesus' servant heart...to show God's love, and to give back what God has blessed me with. 

   I am blessed each and every day with my wonderful family, job, friends students, and my health, but today God showed me a little extra! He showed me his promise to take care us, to not give us more than we can handle, and when we are faithful he will bless! What a wonderful God I serve!

*Not a happy Day for Everyone*



Our First Baby- Ian Vernon Merritt



   All day today I have been in a terrible mood.  Starting last night I felt very sick, tired, and basically run down.  I almost fell asleep during dinner, I  cried at a drop of a hat, and all I wanted to do was climb in bed.  This morning I woke up to a bunch of the same. I had no idea why I was feeling this way when so many exciting things are happening in my life right now.  I went to Elevation tonight, ready to hear the word of God and boy did I.  Pastor Steven Started out by saying that although this is Mother's Day, it is not necessarily a happy day for all... that's all it took, the tears started falling uncontrollably.  I was thankful the music was playing because I was sobbing, and I had no idea why, that's when it hit me...

    On May 7, 2008 me and my husband, not quite one years into our marriage went to a OBGYN check up to see how our little one was doing.  This was our first child and we were about 16 weeks into the pregnancy. We already had been picking up some gender neutral clothes, but I had a feeling it was going to be a boy.  We were hoping the planned ultra sound would show a boy, since my sister in law had just found out what they were having.  We were up in the Mountains where we lived at the time, so family was on pins and needles waiting to hear how everything went.  During the ultra sound we saw our baby clearly for the first time.  You could see every finger, toe, and the ultra sound tech even said look the baby just moved.  Andrew and I were ecstatic, we could barely believe it.  The nurse broke in to our happiness with a quick, "I'll be right back".  I remember her leaving and the next instant the Dr. coming in.  She took a quick look at the monitor and said, "I'm sorry your fetus is dead, there is no heartbeat." "I'll give you a minute, come to my office when you are ready".  Then she left... just left... the ultra sound wand was still inside, the baby clearly visible on the screen.  I remember looking at Andrew's face, and seeing the tears rolling down... none of this was real, was it? When we made it to the office we were told we had options but the only reliable one was for me to go through surgery to remove the "fetus" as she put it, because apparently my body was still acting like it was supporting life. 



Memory Box my Mother in Law
gave me on Mother's Day



Filled with cards, pictures, and
 prayers from family



           The next two days were a blur, I remember laying in bed and talking to a baby I knew physically was still in my stomach, but was with the Lord.  I remember my Mom and Andrew crying with me, and my sweet brother trying to come up with the words to say. On Friday, May 9th I went to the hospital to have surgery.  I remember them putting on the armband and it saying "abortion" I could not control my sobs, this was not a choice, I had no say in this.  I remember a compassionate nurse, an Angel that day taking a marker and writing "miscarriage"  in large letters over it.  She hugged me and said "It will get better, I lost my first and have been blessed with 3 since, the Lord is with you".  The rest is just a fuzzy haze.  I remember waking up at some point in the operating room and crying for my baby.  I remember Andrew driving me home and my parents following. I remember Sunday coming and Andrew's parents coming to see me on Mother's Day..but it was not a day for celebrating for me, I was no longer a mother.  



Courage Willow Tree Angel my Mom gave me
when I came out of surgery.
For all of the Mother's who have gone
through this before.



           Things happen in strange ways.  3 months later I was pregnant with Lilly, and now almost 2 years later I am sharing my 2nd mother's day with my beautiful daughter Lilly.  But I still remember my first little one.  I remember the day after my surgery I called my Great Aunt Mary to see how she was doing.  My Uncle Vernon had been dealing with severe cancer, and hospice had been called in.  I called to let her know that we had named the little one I lost, Ian Vernon after Uncle Vernon.  I remember her crying and telling me, "Lindsay, your Uncle Vernon woke up a little earlier and looked at me and said I just saw Lindsay's baby." My Aunt Mary told me she told Uncle Vernon, remember, Lindsay's baby died and he said, "I know Ina was rocking him in her lap, I saw him".  My Aunt Ina had passed away when I was a Senior in High School, and was very special to me. My Uncle Vernon passed away shortly after that, and I believe he was seeing Heaven, and my little baby was already being taken care of until I can see him again.



         I am very blessed to spend my mother's day with Lilly, but still I think the Lord was reminding me that my other Little One is being taken care of by his Heavenly father, and that gives me peace.

 *I am sorry for the sad words, but it was such a release to type this and cry, and let out every emotion I was feeling.  Thank you for letting me share my story.

                                                                                 



Body Image Game

    Lately some old "demons" have popped back into my head.  Let me start off by telling you MY story. Since I was little I have always had the love and support of my family.  I was a happy go lucky kid who danced most of my life then moved into cheer leading.  Around the 5th grade (about the same time I had to get braces) I started getting that "chubby" kid look to me.  Now, looking back most people look and say, awww you were adorable, in my head it was hideous.  I tried out for Middle School cheer leading and made the squad, and was made co-captain, which was very exciting for me.  Once I got to middle school though things were not the same, I was called "rolls", and fat from 6th to 7th grades.  Now don't get me wrong, I worked out 3 times a week with cheer leading practice, I ate tons of veggies (my Dad was a Vegetarian at the time), it was just "baby" fat.  Well by 8th grade I started getting my "shape" with this I decided that I would die my hair blond (at home by the way, which gave me the strawberry blond/Orange look).  I wanted to be a NEW Lindsay.  I was no longer "rolls" and I wanted to show it.     
    It didn't stop there, once high school came around I made the JV squad, started dating an older football player, and that is when the real pressure began, by 10th grade they had put weight on the tryout form for Varsity Cheer leading.  In my mind, I could not make the squad unless I weighed a certain amount.  I remember getting my physical and when they told me I weighed 118 I cried hysterically, I remember my mom changing the physical form to say 110 because I was inconsolable (sorry Piedmont Cheer leading for the lie). I made the varsity squad and  thats when it happened, I stopped eating.  Throughout my 10th grade year I would not eat breakfast, I would just drink a soda to give me energy.  At lunch I would eat a cookie, or maybe a couple of fries off my boyfriends plate.  When spring came around I decided to play soccer since they ran alot.  With the increase in physical activity, and then not eating I dropped down to around 98 pounds.  I remember getting my prom dress 10th grade year, and having it altered down from an xsmall. Even saying this now gives me a sense of pride, whats wrong with me?
     I continued this habit, I would only eat dinner every night, this being maybe some corn, or green beans, I would take green tea pills I would buy from the grocery store, and would go to sleep early because of all of the headaches.  I remember my friend Holly saying one day at lunch, "Why don't you eat? What's wrong with you? I remember lying and telling her my family generally ate dinner early around 4:00, so I just wanted to wait until then.. it sounds so stupid to me now, but then it was rational.  After the breakup of my and my "older football player boyfriend", I started eating again, I no longer felt I needed to be "perfect". I was already captain of the Varsity squad, homecoming runner up, what more did I need.  My eating problems never really came back, they kind of fazed themselves out.  i didn't see a councilor, I talked to my mom about it, but I felt like I did this on my own.  I even survived the pressure of college cheer leading.


Pregnant with Lilly



      I thought the problem was gone until recently.  After having a baby of course I put on weight and never was really worried about it until last summer.  I started exercising, eating right, and lost a ton of weight.  When I came back to school this year and started getting compliments from co-workers, that little voice in my head started up again... "what if you were smaller" "just think what they would say if you lost another 10 pounds".  Now I am not a silly 15 year old now, and I am thinking much more rationally but the idea of looking better, and getting more compliments did motivate me to lose more, and I did, over all since Lilly I lost over 35 pounds... (now I gained 23 with her so some of that was just getting back to size). Then I started getting pains in my stomach, so much that i could not eat, sleep, walk.  Turns out my gallbladder was not keeping up with my "rapid weight loss" according to the Dr. and it needed to be removed.  Now here I am being brutally honest with my imperfections, but I was glad! I knew that with it removed and the recovery time, I could lose more weight.  Now some of you are reading this thinking, she is a sick person, and maybe I am, but this also have me a reality check.  I was not just "getting smaller" I was hurting my body.  Gallbladder surgery is a painful experience, nothing like a spa vacation where you will lose weight.  I have had to adjust my whole calorie intake so not to overload my stomach, since it no longer has the help of my gallbladder.  Now I am getting things like "Why aren't you eating?" "You better not lose anymore weight you look sickly".  No I am not anorexic, do I know what anorexia is, yes, i dealt with it most of high school.  Do those voices still come back in my head when I eat some fries "you better go run that off quick" yes of course they do, but do they control my life like they used to? NO!



I'm at "Peace" with my weight.. haha...



   I am preparing for one of the biggest goals of my life.. I am competing in the Mrs. North Carolina United States Pageant.  This in itself is a great thing, but it is constantly causing me to keep my "demons in check".  When you are trying on dresses and in your mind think "I know I can fit in this 2", or "why does my back hang over the strap like that".. it's natural, every woman does this.. It's when you say, "well I wont eat dinner tonight and that will help", or "great I guess I can only eat cucumbers for the next 2 days" that you are giving into the problem.  I am writing this for several reasons, one just to get it off my chest.  I have been dealing with this for a while, but now that I am over it I want to share my story.  2- because I see girls struggling with this everyday at my school, even in kindergarten.  Body issues are going on with our 4 and 5 year olds and 3- To let myself know it is ok to be comfortable in YOUR body. I am the healthiest I have ever been, I feel good about myself, and I am setting a great example for my daughter! I should be proud of these things and not look at what some would call imperfections.  This journey to Mrs. North Carolina has inspired me to be the best Lindsay I can be, and leave all of my "demons" where they belong, in the past.

*If you are reading this and need help please check out The National Association of Anorexia and you can get help, or plesae email me and I will help you however I can.

Being a Fabulous Wife

   Not unlike so many other "new" wives, I have found out that marriage is NOT what I expected.  Ok I blame it on my late night "Nick at Night" addition back in high school and college.  All of the "I love Lucy" episodes, and The "Brady Bunch",  plus all of the old black and white TCM movies I love to watch .. it was what a true marriage should be like.. right? WRONG.. I consider myself a unrealistic, constantly optimistic womann who always looks to the bright side of things.  Well I married an openly realistic, "glass half full" kind of guy, and he will tell you that straight up. How do we make it work? We don't always, and that is where i am going with this.  If you are reading this blog expected to hear what most wives will tell you "We are so perfect together", "we never argue", "he is my best friend and cheerleader"...well you are at the wrong blog...

    Today @ Elevation Church we started a series "Mr. and Mrs. Better Half" now I have been at several typical marriage services, where you talk about Husbands honor your wives, wives submit to your husbands, children obey your parents. This was different! The Lord really laid some heavy stuff on my heart today and I am eager to share.  Why is my marriage not perfect? Because if no one is perfect, than how can I expect the union between two "un"perfect people to magically transform into something perfect? I can't, and that is where problem number one comes into play

#1- You can't look at marriage as some magical "fairy tale" kind of thing. You have to see it for what it is, a union between two people who love and commit to one another, no matter how "un"perfect they each may be.

    In our house we are obviously not multi-millionaires, and yes we are crunched when the first of the month comes around with mortgage, car payments, house bills, and now my latest hospital bills.  It seems like Andrew is a little stressed when this time of the month comes around.  Well Friday I came in with bags in hand from my shopping adventure with Lilly. I started pulling out what I had gotten, and bragging about the unbelievable sales there were at the mall.  I could see Andrew's face beginning to get red.. then the dreaded words came "How much money did you spend?!" WHAT?! Did he not just hear about the sales, did  he not just see that I went down 3 dress sizes, does he not understand the importance of having a romper this summer (see previous blog).. here it comes my next point

#2- Stop being selfish in your marriage.  Now this is directly copied from Pastor Furtick's message today.  I was being selfish in the marriage. I knew that this was the paycheck before the bills all came out, I knew that Andrew is the "keeper of finances" in our family. I knew it is his responsibility to pay the bills and balance the budget, and here I was getting upset that he did not say "What a fabulous romper" (like he would say that to begin with but you get the point).  Starting a marriage means dying to yourself.  Your marriage will NEVER work without you giving up some of your selfish things for the betterment of the union.  Christ took on every piece of junk we had on the cross for us, can't we take a little bit of self away for the person we love and are committed too?

  Now I'm sure you and your boyfriend/husband/ etc never argue, yell, cry, or slam doors.  of course not, that is the rednecks down the street (no offense).  Well in the Merritt house we have been known to yell, cry, and slam some doors.  As I said before my husband is very practical, where I am hopefully optimistic and this gets us into a lot of trouble sometimes. Andrew will say something like "You know you can't do that so why are you even talking about it" which then typically brings out a response in me like "Well it is my paycheck so I can" ding ding ding, the battle is on.. Not only am I not respecting the previous point but I am stepping right into my last point...
#3- You should speak to your spouse in a way that brings out their good, not their evil. 

   Again today's sermon really got to me because i am TERRIBLE at this point.  When my husband "bucks up" to me, I go right back at him. What happens next? WWIII at the Merritt house.  Today I learned that I should say words that lift up my husband, I should speak directly to his potential, not to the "punk" side of him that everyone has.  A great example that Pastor Steven gave today was 1 Samuel 25.  It is the story of Abigail, a women who had an evil husband, but due to her level head, and uplifting words she resolved many conflicts her husband brought upon himself and her.  She spoke to David (who was on the war path to killing her husband because of her husbands stupidity), like the king she knew he was, not the angry "hothead" he was at the moment.  This is what I need to do.  When Andrew is upset I need to say words that bring out the amazing man he is, not the angry confrontational man I typically bring out with my hard headiness.

 * Let me say although my marriage is not perfect, I love Andrew with all of my heart. He is an amazing father to Lilly, a provider for our family, and is a protector and up lifter of our family. Those are the amazing qualities that led me to this marriage that we have now, and will keep me here for the rest of my life.  We are constantly working on getting as close to a Godly marriage as we can, but of course things do come up. I encourage you all to look good and hard at your relationships, married or not, and see what God is showing you.  Are you being selfless? Are you being Unrealistic with your expectations? Are you uplifting, and bring out the best in your partner? Are you speaking words that bring out the King or Queen your spouse has the potential to being? Take this week to work on it, and comment and let me know how it is going, or somethings you would like to suggest!